OMG a Post from ME!!
I thought I should make this it's own post rather than a simple comment.
I consider myself a decent human being. Unfortunatly it is next to impossible baring some weird twise of fate to be a decent human being and actually find a mate. As far as I can tell this is why not.
Young human females date arseholes.
Older human females realise they can't have families or long term or non-abusive relationships with arseholes and switch to apparently prefering "Nice Guys"
Unfortunatly they prefer people who have dating experience over those who don't.
Since no one has actually dated any "Nice Guys" they are left over with the same arseholes they dated when they where young.
Arseholes ofcourse pretend to be "Nice Guys" since what women want are "Nice Guys" with dating experience which don't actually exist.
It's alot easier to pretend to be a "Nice Guy" over the short term than it is to pretend to have dating experience over the short term.
Yes this is a very simple model and you can tie up a few loose ends by adding.
Any "Nice Guy" whom actually does get dating experience is very quickly removed from the pool of single men.
This ofcourse leaves single women who aren't considered young with a pool of single, arseholes pretending to be "Nice Guys".
Arseholes never have to change because they have a steady stream of women to have short to medium term relationships with.
Women actually think that they can change arseholes even though it isn't in an arseholes interest to change unless they aren't getting any.
In conclusion both Arseholes and Women want short term pay offs but women complain that they don't get a longer term payoff when it's obvious they don't value it in any way shape or form.
Note: "Nice Guy" here is ofcourse refering to the abiguous definition of what personality qualities women apparently want in a guy. This is be summerised as someone who is acceptable and able to enter into and maintain a long term relationship.
Arseholes ofcourse refers to human males whom have the worst qualities of human beings.
Perhaps I should rename the blog to "nerdcore mysogynists". That would've been a lot funnier if I could spell...
The problem is Experience which is difficult to fake.
It doesn't matter even if you did act like an arsehole it wouldn't work because of the whole lack of experience.
Additionally females assume that males who are experienced at dating are somehow better quality than males who aren't. Which is the case if your interested in a short term relationship but not the case in a long term relationship.
The reason for this is that young females date arseholes.
Assuming older females do actually want a longterm relationship. When they get older they assume that every other female dated guys who are desirable for long term relationships. This ofcourse ignores that such people are probarbly still in that relationship and that every other female dated arseholes too.
And do you really think arseholes pretend to be "Nice Guys"? Some guys can manage seduction, most of the rest get the women to convince themselves that they want to be with them.
As for being yourself, which I’m sure will come up soon enough, I’ll mention one chat I had with friend.
He met a friend’s friend who was hot, bright, and enjoyed working with Matlab, understood what did he was doing in scientific computing and so froth. They met up for dinner as she was passing something on and it was about the right time for dinner, he thought it went well. He calls her up the next day at lunchtime, so she said she was busy at work. The next morning he called again asking if they could meet up for dinner, she said she was busy, and then he asked if he could see him some other time, to which she said she didn’t think so.
I tried to explain to him some of what he did wrong, he complained about how much thought / effort would be needed to do what I suggested. For example he called in the morning because he felt like it, I tried to explain that you normally wait over 24 hours before calling someone, and if they knock you back the first time, don’t try again the next morning during breakfast... if they show no interest at all in meeting you up with you in the next few days then don’t ask if they’ll be free to see you at a later point. As it was his friend called him afterwards to tell him to back off and they had something of a fight about it.
He said something about wanting to be himself and being natural, well I accept that these things don’t come naturally for nerds, myself included, I hope you will accept that we should make some effort to understand women though, at least enough to avoid hurting relations with your mates.
Also, sure they’re different, but they’re still human, we also have the advantage that we have more time to find someone. If they want a family, they should find someone by their early 30s, we don't have that problem.
Secondly my point is about how if you don't have sufficient experience then your immediatly removed for what a women sees as acceptable males to date.
And if you want a third point it really wouldn't supprise me at all that women don't actually want "Nice Guys" at all. They just claim it so they can claim they aren't whores even though they knowingly and consistantly enter into short term relationships with males whom they (should?) know they can only have short term relationships with.
Now why do guys have short term relatinoships? Now because they're human and want some of the same thing as guys you call them whores? Look at yourself.
They say that because people demand that they say that. Some of the better ones will admit that they know what they're doing, but they still need to play the game.
Maybe you should convert to Hinduism and get your parents to arrange your marriage. Just make sure that they have a decent dowry.
One of my friends from Macquarie just flew back to India to get married with someone arraged by his parents, maybe he has the right idea. But then do you trust your parents that much? He is about 30 and came here to do his PhD.
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